Miracles

Miracles are more than just the topic of a classic song from 1975.  "I believe in miracles.  Where you from?  You sexy thing".  Catchy tune, but not where I'm going with this.  Miracles are events attributed to divine intervention.  I guess that means anything that only God could pull off. I know we use the term really broadly.  "It's a miracle I made it through that traffic" ... or the birth of a baby is often described as their own miracle.

You can read about miracles in the Bible ... things that Jesus did that awed people.  Turning water into wine .... the loaves of bread and the fishies.  This post isn't going to give you a bold opinion.  It's merely an exploration of the topic.

I haven't thought too much about miracles.  I believe they happen, but they don't seem to be so "in your face".  I tend to live my life with faith as I see God's blessings over us.  I feel like there has been someone watching over us.  Nothing overly dramatic ... just a feeling of peace and seeing things fall into place when we look back over good and bad times.  I've prayed and I've seen prayers answered.  Not quite as bold as seeing a blind man healed before me.  Do miracles like that still happen today?  Can God really do the impossible?

I really believe that He can.  Then why don't I ask him to?  I'm not so naive as to believe that I know what would be best for me or anyone else, but I do believe that God listens to our prayers.  I've always thought that you should ask God things and wait to see what he thinks is best.  Should I have more faith behind my prayers?  Should I pray believing He WILL do what I ask him or should I pray believing He CAN do what I ask him?  I look back on certain situations where I prayed ... jobs, relationships, houses, babies ... and boy am I glad my prayers weren't answered the way I wanted it to be.  I could have ended up in some crappy situations if I had gotten my way at the time. But what about bolder things???  What about miracles?  Does God still do straight out miracles?  Does God just do a miracle or do you have to ask for it?


You may be wondering where this is all coming from.  It's just something I have been thinking about ... a shift in my thought process I guess you could say.  It was new to me. 

JDD - You shine like the stars.

 I have sung this song to JJ almost every night since she was a baby ..... I love singing it together with her now ....happy 5th birthday sweetheart.  I just love who you are turning into.

Amazing
The morning cold and raining,
dark before the dawn could come
How long in twilight waiting
longing for the rising sun
ohoh ohoh Oh ooh

You came like crashing thunder
breaking through these walls of stone
You came with wide eyed wonder
into all this great unknown
ohoh ohoh Ohoooh Oohh

Hush now don't you be afraid
I promise you I'll always stay
I'll never be that far away
I'm right here with you

[Chorus]
You're so amazing you shine like the stars
You're so amazing the beauty you are
You came blazing right into my heart
You're so amazing you are...You are

You came from heaven shining
Breath of God still fresh on you
The beating heart inside me
Crumbled at this one so new
ohoh ohoh Oooh ooohhh

No matter where or how far you wander
For a thousand years or longer
I will always be there for you
Right here with you

I hope your tears are few and fast
I hope your dreams come true at last
I hope you find love that goes on and on and on and on and on
I hope you wish on every star
I hope you never fall too far
I hope this world can see how wonderful you are


JJ's birthday photoshoots ....

6 weeks old

First birthday!

Second birthday!

Third birthday!

Fourth birthday!

Fifth birthday!

Judged

It happened again .... judgement.  Now, before I play victim I am fully aware of why this happens and that I do it too.  It is easy to make judgements based on your own experience and what you know to be true.

Tee and I have spent months perfecting our daily independant walks.  It is at the point now where all I have to do is stand by the door with two mini "Teepops".  Tee goes and puts her shoes on, politely climbs into her stroller and excitedly opens her little pops with her cubby little fingers.  I am then given the gift of a 30 minute walk.  What a blessing to have this ... you will understand why if you understand four simple words ... "Muscular Dystrophy" and "flight risk".  I'm rather proud of us for being able to do this on our own.

I enjoy meeting people along the way and stopping to talk for a minute.  But then you get the comment, "can't she walk?"  It's almost like they think she should be old enough to walk on her own so they question why I would  have her in a stroller.  My first instinct is to explain the situation, but I don't owe a stranger an explanation.  It takes a lot to just smile and walk away.

I felt the same way on Saturday.  Matthew, JJ and I were excited to walk through the mall to the theatre for her birthday party.  We were in typical Dickey style.  Three of us in a line.  Me with my cane and walking pretty slowly compared to the hurried shoppers.  One lady gawked at us as we passed by.  I asked Matthew why she was starring and he said that she was probably trying to make it all make sense in her own head.  She probably isn't used to seeing a mother with a young child using a cane.  Okay, I can understand that.  She probably didn't think about how we can see her staring at us. 

I guess we question things when they don't make sense to us .... even if we don't know what's going on behind the scenes.  A dear friend of mine wrote an article about this.  She has started a blog about her experience as she tries to get medical help to understand why she can't lose weight.  If you'd like to follow her journey you can read it at www.beautifulbeyondbig.blogspot.com  

In the mean time I will continue to do things the way we need to without worrying about what other's think of us.  I am open to ideas and suggestion to help us, but if I get a blank stare when I bring up the word "autism" or "flight risk", I'll just know that they don't understand and that's okay.  I probably don't understand something about them.

Homemade laundry soap

Okay, before you think I'm such a hippie please remember that this was just an experiment.  After reading a friend's blog I decided to make my own laundry detergent.  I liked this idea because it is extremely economical and more natural.  It cost $20 to make everything and we barely used any of the product ... except the laundry soap.  You'll need one for each batch.  Anyways, Dee and I made up half a batch and today it filled 7 laundry containers.  Don't ask me why we have that many containers laying around!  Matthew did a load of laundry this morning and was impressed.  My underoos were fresh as a daisy :)

It was pretty easy to do.  I used the recipe from the Duggar's, but changed some of the ingredients for things Dee could find in the grocery store and bulk barn.  It was quite an adventure finding the stuff, but it can all be purchased at Zehrs and bulk barn.  If you want to try it just go to their website and look under recipes.  Takes about 30 mins to make, then it sits overnight in a pail.  You pour it into containers and you're set for months!

melt shredded laundry soap bar

This is all it is ... some washing soda, Borax, laundry soap bar and soap essential oils if you want.  I went with Tea Tree oil, but would choose something different next time ... maybe lemon.

Let it sit in the bucket overnight and put in containers the next day ... half solution and half water

What colour is middle C?

I'm absolutely floored!  I had no idea!  A few blogs back I wrote about how my friend and I see things in colour.  I didn't really go on to explain how years, months, weeks and days have colours and patterns as well.  It's not something you really share with people.  It took me a long time to figure out that what I did was not the norm.  After writing this blog I was informed about something called Synesthesia.  My friend and I immediately started researching it.

Synesthesia is a neurologically based sydrome where one sense unconsciously triggers another.  There are a lot of different forms of this, but the most common is Grapheme.  This is where a person sees numbers and letters in colours.  It can also come in a numbered form where dates and such can have an actual location.  When I put both of these together I can see in my head where Thursday is located and that it's peach.  This may sound so weird to you, but it can get far more complicated!  Some people see colours with sound/music or taste things when words or names are mentioned.  I was also told today of someone who gives letters and numbers a gender and personality.  I must mention that this is involuntary.  It just happens.

There are some pieces of criteria to see if you are a synesthetes.

1. Synesthesia is involuntary and automatic
2. Synesthetic perceptions are spatially extended, meaning they often have a sense of "location." For example, synesthetes speak of "looking at" or "going to" a particular place to attend to the experience.
3. Synesthetic percepts are consistent and generic (i.e., simple rather than pictorial).
4. Synesthesia is highly memorable
5. Synesthesia is laden with affect.

If you are having trouble understanding let me give you an example. Patt Duffy explains learning to write: “I realized that to make an R all I had to do was first write a P and then draw a line down from its loop. And I was so surprised that I could turn a yellow letter into an orange letter just by adding a line." Another describes is like this,  "When Valdimir Nabokov, a famous Russian novelist, was a toddler, the colored letters on his wooden blocks irritated him because they were the wrong colors." Now it makes sense why Sarah and I immediately knew that a red van could not be named Carol since Carol is yellow.  This also aids in people's creative process ... that might explain our crazy imaginations and creative proformances.

If you think I'm crazy, that's okay.  This has been around for a long time and went through intense scientific study in the late 19th century and early 20th century.

This is not considered a disorder or anything like that because it doesn't hinder how you function from day to day and most people report that it only enhances their life.  I would agree with this.  I think it helps my imagination and may even help me be organized.  The thing that interests me is that it runs in families.  I can't help but wonder if there is any connection between it and autism, but I didn't find anything in my research linking the two together.  The way that Tee moves and senses music makes me wonder if she has sound colour synesthesia.

I read that 1 in 90 have coloured Grapheme so statistically speaking Sarah and I are probably the only ones who read my blog who have this.  Although, they say that as many as 1 in 25 have some form of Synesthesia. If you have any or heard of any of the other kinds I'd love to hear about it.

He made a hippo that weighs a tonne

I remember a kid's song I used to sing.  One of the verses went like this ...
"God's fingerprints are everywhere
Just to show how much He cares
But in between He had lots of fun
He made a hippo that weighs a tonne"

A few weeks ago I think Matthew and I were about ready to crawl under a rock or throw in the towel.  Of course we didn't, but as we sat on our bed we admitted to eachother that we just didn't know what to do.  Our car was dead, we had so much to sort through with Tee.  I was frustrated with my body and it just felt like things were up against a wall.  We knew things could be a lot worse, but we felt stuck.

As the verse said, God's fingerprints are everywhere.  Looking over the past few weeks we didn't know what to do, but somehow God's hands were behind the scenes doing things for us.  The week the car died we were given an unexpected amount of money.  Then my Dad shows up and works us a great deal that is under the amount of money were had budgeted for the car.  We were so worried about me being able to get in and out of a small car and somehow my Dad finds this little mechanics shop in Kitchener that is selliing a minivan in our prices range.  We were desperate for something to drive and somehow we ended up with something better that even mentioned at a lower price.

Not only that, we didn't know what to do with Tee and somehow funding has come in that covers exactly the cost of Tee's program and some money to pay someone to take her.  Not only that, but we had a dear friend be willing to do it for a price that was in our budget.  Tee now has a starting date, a way to get there and a way to pay for it.

A few weeks ago having all these things sorted seemed impossible. These "problems" may seem small compared to what other people are dealing with, but when you add frustration and guilt over not feeling like you're able to provide things, it can seem overwhelming.  To be honest, I want to take care of Tee myself.  I want to be able to walk her there.  I want to have a great job so I can have the means to work out my own problems.  That's not going to happen anytime soon.  I have to watch other people do the things I desperately want to do myself.  Seeing all the details worked out gives me hope. It's not to say that things won't seem like they are falling apart again, but I see God's fingerprints and provision over us ... I just hope I don't turn into that hippo that weighs a tonne!

Mystery ...

 

It was a dark and stormy night.  The kind of night that lurks with mystery and has all your senses hightened.  Nana and Papa had come to visit.  It was a surprise visit ... no one knew exactly why they had come, but it was to the delight of the two young ladies that lived in the manor.  It was often referred to as a castle, but it was really more like a bungalow.

Nana and Papa had taken the oldest out for some lunch while the younger stayed back to take a nap after an eventful morning of dancing.  The house was quiet.

The owners of the manor were left to their own thoughts.  Sir was playing with some of his buddies in his study while the Lady of the house snuggled up in her chambers reading.  It was beginning to get dark outside which only fed the feeling of fatigue.  It was the perfect time to snuggle beneath the covers.

This is where the mystery began.  As the lady read all the mail addressed to her she began to wonder who the people were who were writing to her.  There were a few letters written with names attached that were very familiar.  It was the people that showed up on her stats that left her confused.  There had been people from Canada, United States, New Zealand, United Kingdom, Ethiopia, India, Germany and France.  One could guess a few, but the lady remained bewildered for awhile.  Who could these people be?  

Help us solve this mystery ... perhaps you enjoy the mystery yourself and would like to remain a dark, cloaked figure in the night, but it you are willing to reveal yourself leave a note and let us know who you are.

Final Five names ... cast your vote!

Okay, we have the minivan narrowed down to 5 names.  Let us know what your vote is (Ryan and Denielle, we could not put any of your suggestions for censoring reasons.  Although there is one name that will always stick in my mind)

1) Ruby Tuesday - A nice tribute to the Rolling Stones.  We also said goodbye to Pontiac Pete on a Tuesday

2) Rangel Love - We have no idea what this means, but this is what JJ wants to name it.

3) Ruby Igo -  This name because it's red and Tee learned to say "I go" that week.  She even said it when we were in the shop waiting for the ownership to be transfered to our name.

4) Atlas - When you have kids they kind of become your world and this van is going to be carrying them around like Atlas carried the world.  It will also become a voyager and see many maps. 


5) Caesar - The minivan is so much higher than Pete so we feel like we're sitting on a throne. Roman soldiers also wore red capes.

What's inside your head? ... hope it's not empty!

My friend Sarah and I have vivid imaginations.  We seem to be able to scare ourselves for no known reason.  I'm sure we've scared our husbands too.   We got ourselves so worked up once about something that when we peeked out the window we both actually screamed when we saw the moon.  Horror movies are 4 times scarier if we watch them together.  Scream was awesome .... a picture fell off the wall during the movie and we crept over to open the main door so we'd have a place to run after we bravely (by bravely I mean huddled together like school girls) checked the bedroom where the picture fell.  We were troopers that night.  


We also loved to make up stories and do skits for the Sundayschool kids.  We may have actually convinced ourselves that we were in Nineveh with Jonah.  Okay, before you think we've lost touch with reality, we are not crazy.  We just have vivid imaginations.  Our poor friend Karen could not understand how we could "see" things in our heads.  Karen will openly admit that she lacks imagination.  Karen is a very intellectual and practical person.  Sarah and I are more visual and probably more emotionally charged.  We are all different, but equally cool.

Now here's the weird part.  Sarah and I associate everything with a colour in our heads.  I didn't realize I did this until I was in my 20's.  The even weirder part is that Sarah has the same colour associations as me.  For example, Sarah's husband suggested we name the new red van "Carol".  Our first response was that you can't do that because Carol is something you name a yellow car.  Does anyone else do this??????  We have tried to figure out why this happens.  We grew up in the same area and wondered if it was part of our curriculum.  To help us understand, please take this little test below.  I'm going to give you 5 words.  Before you see anyone else's answer or think too hard, write down the first colour you think of.


1) The letter T
2) Wednesday
3) Sofa 
4) Canada
5) Adelle 


I'm so curious!!  Ask your spouses too!

Name the newest member of our family

Was not planning on getting a minivan, but seeing how hard is and will increasingly be to get in and out of little cars we thought it was the best idea.  We were totally surprised that minivans are almost cheaper than cars (although I'm assuming they will be more in gas).

It still has to be certified and e-tested this weekend, but now we can enjoy our anniversary weekend knowing that we should have something to drive early in the week.

So ... what shall we name this car??  
Since our relationship we've had Hannah the Honda, Franchesca the blue genie and Pontiac Pete.  Oh I will miss Pontiac Pete ... we got him the week after we got married.  He almost made it 7 years.


Suggestions for this Ford Windstar .....

Emotional Shopper

Buying our first house was pretty fun .... at first.  Then we would lose bidding wars and I would start to get emotionally involved.  I remember waiting for offers to be accepted and being so anxious the whole time ... then we would be outbid and I'd be upset.  Matthew would explain that you can't get attached to a house.  You have to be willing to walk away.  It got even worse when we ran out of bungalows in our price range to check out and we had a week to purchase a house.  I guess I am an emotional shopper.

Now we're in the same boat with a car.  We have a rental for a week.  Like the house, we have specific things that need to be met in a low price range.  I thought I'd found the car and an hour before we were to go see it the lovely older gentleman called to say it was gone.  I got emotional.  In hinde sight I understand that it isn't the car for us.

Now my Dad is here for the morning and I can see clearer now.  We test drove a couple last night and we learned a lot from him.  He knew all about the cars and even talked the guy down a thousand bucks.  We didn't buy it because my Dad says we can do better or even get the guy to drop more today.  Hoping we can find something today, but I'll try not to get emotional about it.

Looking back at buying our house, this was the very last house available in Kitchener and Cambridge with our requirements and price range and it turned out to be the best house we even saw.  Who knows what will happen with a car.